Wish you a great week ahead

LONGEST MARRIED COUPLE (85 YEARS!) GIVES RELATIONSHIP ADVICE

 

Meet Herbert and Zelmyra Fisher of North Carolina. They have been married 85 years (86 in May) and hold the Guinness World Record mnganjo@imap.pta.idasa.org.za:143/fetch%3EUID%3E.INBOX%3E4578> for the longest marriage of a living couple and get this…. Zelmyra is 101 years old and Herbert is 104.
The happily married couple teamed up with twitter this Valentine’s Day mnganjo@imap.pta.idasa.org.za:143/fetch%3EUID%3E.INBOX%3E4578> to answer some relationship questions. Check out their take on finding love mnganjo@imap.pta.idasa.org.za:143/fetch%3EUID%3E.INBOX%3E4578> , getting through hard times and more. Good read.
1. What made you realize that you could spend the rest of your lives together? Were you scared at all?
H & Z: With each day that passed, our relationship was more solid and secure. Divorce was NEVER an option - or even a thought.
2. How did you know your spouse was the right one for you?We grew up together & were best friends before we married. A friend is for life - our marriage has lasted a lifetime
3. Is there anything you would do differently after more than 80 years of marriage?We wouldn’t change a thing. There’s no secret to our marriage, we just did what was needed for each other & our family.
4. What is your advice to someone who is trying to keep the faith that Mr. Right is really out there?
Zelmyra: Mine was just around the corner! He is never too far away, so keep the faith - when you meet him, you’ll know.
5. What was the best piece of marriage advice you ever received?Respect, support & communicate with each other. Be faithful, honest & true. Love mnganjo@imap.pta.idasa.org.za:143/fetch%3EUID%3E.INBOX%3E4578> each other with ALL of your heart
6. What are the most important attributes of a good spouse?
Zelmyra: A hard worker & good provider. The 1920s were hard, but Herbert wanted & provided the best for us. I married a good man!
7. What is your best Valentine’s Day memory?
Zelmyra: I cook dinner EVERY day. Herbert left work early & surprised me – he cooked dinner for me! He is a VERY good cook!
Herbert: I said that I was going to cook dinner for her & she could relax - the look on her face & clean plate made my day!
8. You got married very young – how did u both manage to grow as individuals yet not grow apart as a couple?
“Everyone who plants a seed & harvests the crop celebrates together” We are individuals, but accomplish more together.
9. What is your fondest memory of your 85-year marriage?
Our legacy: 5 children, 10 grandchildren, 9 great-grandchildren, and 1 great-great grandchild.
10. Does communicating get easier with time? How do you keep your patience?
The children are grown, so we talk more now. We can enjoy our time on the porch or our rocking chairs - together.
11. How did you cope when you had to be physically separated for long periods of time?
Herbert: We were apart for 2 months when Z was hospitalized with our 5th child. It was the most difficult time of my life. Zelmyra’s mother helped me with the house and the other children, otherwise I would have lost my mind.
12. At the end of bad relationship day, what is the most important thing to remind yourselves?Remember marriage is not a contest – never keep a score. God has put the two of you together on the same team to win
13. Is fighting important?NEVER physically! Agree that it’s okay to disagree, & fight for what really matters. Learn to bend - not break!
14. What’s the one thing you have in common that transcends everything else?
We are both Christians & believe in God. Marriage is a commitment to the Lord. We pray with & for each other every day.

Visual Multiplication with Lines

Visual Multiplication with Lines

Here's a way to multiply numbers visually!

Suppose you want to multiply 22 by 13. Draw 2 lines slanted upward to the right, and then move downward to the right a short distance and draw another 2 lines upward to the right (see the magenta lines in Figure 1). Then draw 1 line slanted downward to the right, and then move upward to the right a short distance and draw another 3 lines slanted downward to the right (the cyan lines in Figure 1).

Now count up the number of intersection points in each corner of the figure. The number of intersection points at left (green-shaded region) will be the first digit of the answer. Sum the number of intersection points at the top and bottom of the square (in the blue-shaded region); this will be the middle digit of the answer. The number of intersection points at right (in the yellow-shaded region) will be the last digit of the answer.

This will work to multiply any two two-digit numbers, but if any of the green, blue, gold sums have 10 or more points in them, be sure to carry the tens digit to the left, just as you would if you were adding.

Presentation Suggestions:

First do simple examples like the one above; then try a problem that involves a carry, such as 21 x 34.

The Math Behind the Fact:

The method works because the number of lines are like placeholders (at powers of 10: 1, 10, 100, etc.), and the number of dots at each intersection is a product of the number of lines. You are then summing up all the products that are coefficients of the same power of 10. Thus the in the example

22 x 13 = ( 2*10 + 2 ) * ( 1*10 + 3 ) = 2*1*100 + 2*3*10 + 2*1*10 + 2*3 = 286.

The diagram displays this multiplication visually. In the green-shaded region there are 2*1=2 dots. In the blue-shaded region there are 2*3+2*1=8 dots. In the gold-shaded region there are 2*3=6 dots. This method does exactly what you would do if you wrote out the multiplication the long way and added the columns!

The method can be generalized to products of three-digit numbers (or more) using more sets of lines (and summing the dot groupings vertically and remembering to carry when needed). It can also be generalized to products of three-numbers using cubes of lines rather than squares! (Of course, it gets pretty unwieldy to use the method at that point.)

A True Love Story

  

Legal jokes--- no charge First Joke

A man went to his lawyer and told him, "My neighbour owes me $500 andhe doesn't want to pay up.What should I do?" "Do you have any proof?", asked the lawyer.

"Nope," replied the man. "Okay, then write him aletter asking him for the $1,000 he owes you," said the lawyer. "But it's only $500!" replied the man. "Precisely, that's what he will reply and we will have the proof we need," said the lawyer.

Second Joke

The professor of a Contract Law class asked one of his better students, "If you were to give someone an orange, how would you go about it?" The student replied, "Here's an orange." The professor was outraged."No! No! Think like a lawyer!" The student then replied, "Ok.I will tell him - "I hereby give and convey to you all and singular, my estate and interests, rights, claim, title and advantages of and in, said orange, together with all its rind, juice, pulp and seeds,and all rights and advantages with full power to bite, cut, freeze and otherwise eat, the same, or give the same away with and without the pulp, juice, rind and seeds, anything herein before and hereinafter or in any deed, or deeds, instruments of whatever nature or kind whatsoever to the contrary in anywise notwithstanding.
 
Third Joke  -

 A dog ran into a butcher shop and grabbed a roast off the counter.Fortunately, the butcher recognised the dog as belonging to a neighbour of his. The neighbour happened to be a lawyer. Incensed at the theft, the butcher called up his neighbour and said, "Hey, if yourdog stole a roast from my butcher shop, would you be liable for the cost of the meat?" The lawyer replied, "Of course, how much was the roast?" "$7.98." A few days later the butcher received a cheque in the mail for for $7.98. Attached to it was an invoice that read : 'LegalConsultation Service: $150.

Fourth Joke  -

The lawyer's son wanted to follow in his father's footsteps, so he went to law school. He graduated with Honours, and then went home to join his father's legal firm. At the end of his first day at work he rushed into his father's office, and said, "Father, you know what, in one day I managed to solve the accident case that you've been working on for 10 years!" His father responded : " You idiot, we lived on the funding of that case for 10 years!"  

 
PETROL TIPS - info!!  (MUST  READ)
How to get more per liter. Very informative and MONEY-SAVER!!!

TIPS  ON PUMPING PETROL

I  don't know what you guys are paying for  petrol.... I am paying  up to Rs.1.35 to Rs.1.50 per liter. My line of work  is in petroleum for about 31 years now, so here  are some tricks to get more of your money's  worth for every Liter: 

Here  at the Shell Pipeline where I work ,  we deliver about 4 million liters in a 24-hour  period .. One day is diesel the  next day is jet fuel, and petrol, regular and  premium grades. We have 34-storage tanks here  with a total capacity of 16,800,000  Liters.

Only  buy or fill up your car or truck in the early  morning when the ground temperature is still  cold. Remember  that all service stations have their storage  tanks buried below ground. The colder the ground  the more dense the petrol, when it gets warmer  petrol expands, so buying in the afternoon or in  the evening....your liter is not exactly a  liter. In the petroleum business, the specific  gravity and the temperature of the petrol,  diesel and jet fuel, ethanol and other petroleum  products plays an important  role. 

A  1-degree rise in temperature is a big deal for  this business. But the service stations do not  have temperature compensation at the  pumps.

When  you're filling up do not squeeze the trigger of  the nozzle to a fast modeIf you look you will see that the trigger has  three (3) stages: low, middle, and high.You  should be pumping on low mode, thereby  minimizing the vapours that are created while  you are pumping. All hoses at the pump have vapour return. If you are pumping on the fast  rate, some of the liquid that goes to your tank  becomes vapour. Those vapours are being sucked  up and back into the underground storage tank so you're getting less worth for your money.

One of the most important tips is to fill up when  your Petrol tank is HALF FULL. The reason  for this is the more Petrol you have in your  tank the less air occupying its empty space.  petrol evaporates faster than you can imagine.  petrol storage tanks have an internal floating roof. This roof serves as zero clearance between  the Petrol and the atmosphere, so it minimizes  the evaporation. Unlike service stations, here  where I work, every truck that we load is  temperature compensated so that every liter is actually the exact amount.

Another reminder, if there is a petrol truck pumping  into the storage tanks when you stop to buy Petrol, DO NOT fill up; most likely  the petrol is being stirred up as the Petrol is being delivered, and you might pick up some of  the dirt that normally settles on the  bottom.

To have an impact, we need to reach literally  millions of Petrol buyers. It's really simple to  do.

Award winning joke!

   One Chinese walks into a bar in America late one night and he saw Steven Spielberg. As he was a great fan of his movies, he rushes over to him, and asks for his autograph.
Instead, Spielberg gives him a slap and says "You Chinese people bombed our Pearl Harbor, get out of here."

The astonished Chinese man replied "It was not the Chinese who bombed your Pearl Harbor , it was the Japanese".  

"Chinese, Japanese, Taiwanese, you're all the same," replied Spielberg.

In return, the Chinese gives Spielberg a slap and says "You sank the Titanic; my forefathers were on that ship."

Shocked, Spielberg replies "It was the iceberg that sank the ship, not me."

The Chinese replies, "Iceberg, Spielberg, Carlsberg, you're all the same."

This particular joke won an award for the best joke in a competition in Britain

Man , Woman and Marriage

A woman worries about the future, till she gets a husband.
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he does't.
A man marries a woman expecting that she wo't change and she does.

A man will pay Tsh 20000 for a Tsh 10000 item he needs.
A woman will pay Tsh 10000 for a Tsh 20000 item that she does't need.

A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.
 

DEFINITIONS

School:A place where Papa pays and Son plays.




Life Insurance: A contract that keeps you poor all your life so that you can die Rich.



Nurse:A person who wakes u up to give you sleeping pills.


Marriage: It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her masters..

Tears:The hydraulic force by which masculine willpower is defeated by feminine waterpower.



Lecture: An art of transferring information from the notes of the Lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through "the minds of either"


Conference: The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.


Compromise: The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece.


Dictionary: A place where success comes before work.



Conference Room: A place where everybody talks, nobody listens and everybody disagrees later on.



Father: A banker provided by nature.

Boss:Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early.


Politician: One who shakes your hand before elections and your Confidence after.



Doctor: A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you by bills.



Smile:A curve that can set a lot of things straight.

Yawn:The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth.

Etc.: A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.


Committee: Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together.


Experience: The name men give to their mistakes.

Always be positive

When A Lizard Can, Why Cant We? (Story)

WHEN A LIZARD CAN, WHY CAN'T WE?

 This is a true story that happened in Japan.

 In order to renovate the house, someone in Japan breaks open the wall. Japanese houses normally have a hollow space between the wooden walls. When tearing down the walls, he found that there was a lizard stuck there because a nail from outside hammered into one of its feet. He sees this, feels pity, and at the same time curious, as when he checked the nail, it was nailed 10 years ago when the house was first built. What happened? The lizard has survived in such position for 10 years!!!!!!! !!! In a dark wall partition for 10 years without moving, it is impossible and mind-boggling. Then he wondered how this lizard survived for 10 years!!! Without moving a single step--since its foot was nailed! So he stopped his work and observed the lizard, what it has been doing, and what and how it has been eating. Later, not knowing from where it came appears another lizard, with food in its mouth. Ah! He was stunned and touched deeply. For the lizard that was stuck by nail, another lizard has been feeding it for the past 10 years..

. Imagine? It has been doing that untiringly for 10 long years, without giving up hope on its partner. Think, will u do that to your partner? Think that will you do it to your Mom who brought you after a big struggle of nine long months?

 Or at least to your Dad, Friends, Co-workers, brothers and Sisters? Imagine what a small creature can do that a creature blessed with a brilliant mind can't.

 As information and communication technology advances, our access to information becomes faster and faster. But the distance between human beings . . . is it getting closer as well? Please never abandon your loved ones

 Never Say U R Busy When They Really Need You ...

You May Have The Entire World At Your Feet.....

But You Might Be The Only World To Them.... 

 A Moment of negligence might break the very heart which loves you thru all odds..

Before you say something just remember..It takes a moment to Break but an entire life to make... To Live Use Heart And to Survive use Brains.

 Then Life would be a paradise Unfurling only Love Joy and Happiness... ...

Spread this message to everyone you Love and Help them Live life and not merely Survive.....